Breckenridge Bump.

These past two weeks have been a roller coaster ride...

The kind of roller coaster ride that you really were not expecting.
The kind where you're not strapped in right so your limbs are flailing all over the place, and you're projectile vomiting from stupidly eating too much...
Obviously you were ill-prepared and not expecting this.

But oddly enough, though most of it is uncomfortable and unpleasant, there are bumps you enjoy along the way.

And sometimes, you think you can see what heaven must look like from the top of that peak.

And there are friends there to help you get you through a lot of the rough spots, 

whether they know it or not.

Friends to make you laugh, and to help you remember why you are here.

We all fall down sometimes.

But we all get back up eventually.

From this valley.

I'm happy with who I have turned into the past few years,

But at the same time I know there are still parts of me that need working on.

Obviously, though right?  Who doesn't have those internal struggles?

When I'm going through a hard time,

I make myself sick.

Literally, sick.

I have no urge to get out of bed, I sleep and sleep but I'll wake up in the middle of the night with the worst stomach aches I feel I've ever felt.

Two days ago, I forced myself to go on a solo hike to Grandeur Peak,

 hoping it would give me the peace and serenity that I so badly needed.

It was 6 1/2 miles round trip, give or take. 

I started the hike listening to a self-help book that, as I realized upon further ascent, was doing me no good as a hiker.

I needed to just be present and recognize what my body was doing.

I started listening to music.

But still, I was thinking.  And thinking, and thinking.

It was a slow, hard hike for me.  I tired easily.

My body hated me for not feeding it breakfast earlier, but I just had no appetite.

Trail runners passed me, and then passed me again.  That was embarrassing.

I made it to the top, tired emotionally and physically.

I sat down, but not before looking all around me.

Taking in that view was something I could never explain.

A 360 degree view of nothing but beauty, mountains, valleys, and some cities in between.

Pictures couldn't capture it.

I couldn't either, because I was too emotionally exhausted to take it in.

But, it was beautiful.

I made some friends at the peak.  A 77-year old man named George, who was almost too kind, and a 40-ish year old recently divorced woman and her dogs.  We listened to each other's stories for a bit, then parted ways.  I think that was the part of the beauty I captured that day -  3 different people, at the top of the same hike, reflecting on life.  That's the kind of thing that makes the world go 'round. 

I'm sore in a good way.

It feels like I accomplished something.

I know I will look back on this day and smile, but right now that just takes a lot of work.

It's Okay.

A lot of days I feel like this job is fit just for me, and I love it...

I'm passionate about it.

But some days, it's just really hard.

Today is one of those "some days".

We all have our personal baggage that we are supposed to stow at the door 

so to speak as we enter work.  

However, every single employee/employer knows that a lot of times that's just not possible.

Instead of having to sit a a computer or through meetings on a "blah" day,

Picture having to help tell a family that their little one has cancer.

And having to explain that to them...Just a little at a time, because you know they are so overwhelmed.

There are so many, many questions.

Then sending them to get procedures done

And having to proceed to traumatize them some other way directly afterwards, whether it be pokes, or taking off a bandaid over a sore spot.

Today, I'm not going to be remembered as Super nurse,

Or nice nurse, or 'That one Nurse I really liked".
Instead, I'm going to be remembered as 

"The Nurse that poked me and it hurt,"

and "The Nurse that was there to tell me I had cancer."
I guess that's okay.
I guess sometimes that happens.

As much as that hurts my heart,

That is a part of my job description.

Sometimes it's okay to cry.

Halloween and Sister.

Happy Halloween y'all!

I have probably shared above picture about a million times on this blog (for a million different reasons) but it's halloween, it's classic, and it's my sister's birthday.  She's 23.  

That means she's getting old...And so am I.

In honor of this holiday, I am home in my pajamas.  I found out via email that Ann Taylor Loft is having a 40% off everything flash sale and since it's within walking distance of my condo (seriously, what a curse/blessing/flashback to New York City living), I had to go get myself some treats.  After that was done, I realized I didn't have any Halloween candy..And we have some super cute kids that live above us so I felt obliged to be prepared.

I stumbled across my favorite fall candy EVER, caramel apple lollipops.

  I bought two jumbo packages.

No one has shown up and it's been 2 hours.

That means that they're all mine.  Yum yum yum.

I was thinking about maybe bringing some upstairs to my neighbors, but that's considered kind of creepy these days I think.

Speaking of creepy....

This is me circa 1999.  One of my old good friends put this up on facebook and I almost died laughing.  At that time, I thought I was a beautiful, stylish Britney Spears from her video "Hit Me Baby One More Time" -  Not even close Amy, not even close.  So awkward, but so classic.

I showed this to Leard last night and he did a triple take and said something to the extent of...

"That was you?!  You've changed a lot."

Yep.

 Next on the agenda,

My sister.  Alison, Ali Cat, Ali Kitten, ButterAliCat, Alan....
She is 23 as of 12:00pm today.  On Halloween.

I was 2 1/2 years old when she made her appearance into the world.

There is video footage somewhere of me, the only child, being asked if I wanted a brother or a sister.  To which I responded "No, can I have a dog?"

But instead, I lucked out with a sister.

 It's been approximately 4 years since our last physical fight (I ended up with a big scratch on my face, she ended up with milk on her Macbook and hair pulled out).  

Now, we love each other.  We always have, but still.

Now, she's a mom and I'm an Aunt.  Weird.

I love us Madden girls.  

Ali, you are beautiful.

Love you so much.

I'm proud of you.  And I am lucky you are my little sister FOREVA.

First thing's First, Second Thing's Second, Etc.

I'm going to talk about a few things tonight-

One being that I miss my family.

That is a given.

I miss them every day and I wish, hope and pray that they will come to see me soon.
I've been in Utah for over 2 years with not one visit!

Second is my new cooking hobby-

I love it!

I have  been cooking a lot of different dishes that would have otherwise been out of my comfort zone... And they are turning out delightful.

If only everyone in the world had a Tuesday night off, then I could cook for all of my loved ones.

That's another thing about cooking - It kind of makes me lonely sometimes.  Because when I am super happy and proud of a dish I made, it's hard to find someone to enjoy it with me.

(plus, I need a dining room table, or any kind of table and chairs to host a meal.)

Third is my job. 

My job can be hard sometimes,

and compassion fatigue is real.

Although it's hard to explain to people with regular jobs who feel fatigue every day,

as a pediatric oncology nurse it's a little different.

I remember telling someone in September that I needed a mental health day.

They laughed.

But really, it's necessary sometimes!

This job can be so rewarding, so amazing, but so draining at the same time.

Especially the hours.  Those kill me...And my social life.

But right now, overall I am happy.

And this is the song that is always in my head.

Sunday Blues.

Sometimes on Sundays,

I wake up after a night shift at 2pm on the wrong side of the bed 

(sometimes literally),

and I'm really grouchy, and feel overwhelmed.

I miss my family, too.

Sometimes, Sundays aren't the best.

I want to go skiing.

She Cooks, Cleans & Listens to Podcasts.

For my twenty-fifth year on this earth,

I think I've finally come into touch with my feminine instincts.

Like cooking and cleaning, for instance.

Weird, but I never really had this domesticated urge until this past year.

I guess last year it started rearing its' head (albeit slowly) with me trying to copy my mom's recipes.

Now I'm making my own, and loving them.

It has to be said here that my mom is a lovely cook -

She has since semi-retired, but still has her token recipes

(among them, Dutch meatballs, the token of all tokens).

This woman that I call 'mom' fed me all of my baby food seasoned with garlic salt.

And she added garlic/garlic salt to anything that you could imagine.

I loved it.

I love garlic....And I will always make that a staple in my cooking.

Did I mention that I find it more peaceful if I'm listening to a podcast?

I pretend like I am a 1940's housewife listening to the AM radio....

Except I'm learning about way cool things.

A couple of my favorites are "This American Life" with Ira Glass, "RadioLab" and "Stuff to Blow Your Mind".

Do you listen to Podcasts, or am I the only one?

First Birthday.

One year ago today, I was waiting to become an aunt.

Little did we know, she would not grace us with our presence until 24 hours later...

Because obviously she wanted to be born on a cool date.  10/11/12.

Since it's all the rage these days for celebrities to post open letters to one another  (See: Miley and Sinead)...And I like to think I'm a celebrity trapped in an ordinary person's body,

I figured I'd post an open letter to my little sister and niece.

To my sister:

Ali, tomorrow is as big of a day for you as it is for Audrey.

It marks one year of you being a mom.

I still can't believe you're a mom sometimes.  And a really good one at that.  Actually I can believe it, but it's still weird!

I know this year has probably been the most challenging year of your life to date.  But I know that you have your priorities right on, and would do anything for Audrey.

I love you, and I am so proud of how much you have grown this past year!

And to my sassy, smiley little niece:

Audrey Jane, 

You can't read right now...But one day you will love to, just like your aunt.  

I have a good feeling about that.  So when that day comes, you'll have this to read.

I know it sucks that I live across the country, but I have such a huge amount of love for you.

So much love that it explodes out of my heart and radiates all the way from my home in Utah 

to yours in New York.  It's constantly streaming out of this heart of mine.

I've only gotten to see you for three short periods of time in the past year:  

Your birth, your first Christmas, and a week in the summer.

Call it silly, but I think you know how much I love you.  You're a smart girl.

When you, your grandpa and Chris picked me up from the airport this summer and I hadn't seen you since Christmas, your sleepy eyes lit up just a little and you smiled when you saw me.

So remember, you and I have a connection little girlfriend....And it isn't just our great taste in dance music ('Blurred Lines' will always be my fave song to dance to with you, and Miley will never come between that).

I can't wait to see you again.

Love,

Aunt Amy

Quarter Life.

There comes a time in one's life

When you're on the phone with a doctor's office,

And they ask how old you are.

When you say out loud '25' you think in your head, 

'Wait a second, that's not right..', proceed to do the math

and indeed, 25 is the correct number.

You're doing this while you're sitting in your car in front of the grocery store.

You're there to buy fresh vegetables and produce.

You just got back from getting some home decor and cleaning supplies at Target.

You are planning on going home and cleaning, getting out that trusty tool kit that you bought only last month and hanging some things.

You're going to pay your electric bill, too.

Last Friday,

You got up (still, far too late) and had the desire to be active.  

It was around 45 degrees out, but you didn't care...You wanted to hike.

If it proved to be impossible to hike due to weather, you were at least going to run.

You've never felt that way before in your life....You were craving activity.

It was the craziest thing.

You went on that hike despite the cold...And an even crazier thing happened.

It snowed.  

On the 27th of September, you were caught in snow.

You looked out at the mountains around you, and this snowfall and thought about how never in your life had you seen snow fall in September...And you think about your life, and you are happy.  

Happy to the point of tears.

Growing up really is okay.

Life can be lovely.

The end for now.

Humble Like Dreams.

Anyone who knows me knows that I read, a lot.  I recently finished two wonderful 1000+ page books, 'Pillars of the Earth' and its' sequel 'World Without End'.  They were delightful.

Last night, I picked up a book I've been putting off reading- mainly because I don't want to be disappointed; I have read some amazing books lately.  However, 64 pages in I came across this quote.  And for some reason, I can't shake it.  I've read it about a million times.

"Words and emotions are simply currencies.  If we inflate them, they lose their value, just like money.  They begin to mean nothing.  Use 'beautiful' to describe a sandwich and the word means nothing.  Since the war, there is no more room for inflated language.  Words and feelings are small now- clear and precise. Humble like dreams."

-'Beautiful Ruins', by Jess Walter

That's all for now.

Tweenaged Nurse.

The past two weeks, I've realized that I really love my job.

Here are two situations that brightened my week(s):

1) Took care of a cute 3-year old who showed me all of his cool superhero powers at the beginning of my night shift.  At midnight, I go in to wake him up for his vitals.  He was in a deep sleep.

'Bud, I'm sorry but it's time to get up for a second.' - Me.  

It took me a minute of tapping his shoulder and repeating...And he finally responds:

'....Spiderman...?" - Him

If he could think of me as Spider-Man even for just one second...I mean, I'm cool with that.

2) 12-year old girl and I - She's having a crappy day, watching Ellen on TV.  I ask her what her fave show is...

'Well, it's not this show, it's Pretty Little Liars.  FOR SURE." - Her

"I LOVE Pretty Little Liars!  Have you seen the season finale?" - Me

"Yes, I can't wait for the two hour Halloween episode!  I have one important question for you though... Are you Team Spoby?" -Her

'Team Spoby all the way.  Top two favorite characters and romance hands down.' - Me

I have to give myself some credit for knowing the fan-girl lingo, but I'll admit that shortly after walking away from this heart to heart I wondered if her mom was questioning my age and validity as a nurse.  

I'm just a Tweenager at heart, what can I say?

Fall is Coming.

So, since I last left off here, it has become September, which I still refuse to believe...I'm in denial, I am.

Summer is almost over.

It will be 80-90 degrees on average for another month(-ish) here in Salt Lake - and for the first time, I will not complain about this.  I will attempt to cherish every minute before I take out those pesky winter clothes.

In the past 3 weeks, I have visited Upstate NY (home)...

Most wonderful trip.  Ever.  I love my little-big niece.

And I have moved again.  Not a crazy move, just a few miles away to a condo in a cute neighborhood right outside of Salt Lake - But a move is a move.  It's frustrating, busy, and overwhelming.  I am just settling in to my new condo as I type.  Or am I procrastinating on unpacking?   Verdict is still out.

Fun little fact about my condo:  We have a private sauna on our patio.  Like, you walk out to our private patio and there is a sauna.  It's the silliest thing.  I wonder if we will ever use it.

I've developed a huge love for hiking and try to go at least once a week.  My plan is to keep doing this until it's too cold.  The last hike I did, Desolation Trail was absolutely stunning.  And it wasn't torture, either.  It was just perfect for my skill level.  

This is not from Desolation Trail, but a hike called "The Living Room".   Very, very hot that day.

Occasionally I come home from work smiling so big.  It is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, everyone...And how I wish I could share some of the stories I have from these past 8 months.  Let's just say, hugs from brave bald kids make my heart so happy.

Currently reading:  Ken Follett anything.  Well, I'm really only on the second book I've read of his considering they are 1000+ pages each.  He just makes me want to go back in time and live with these characters.  To start, I recommend you read Pillars of the Earth.  It's a life-changer...You'll be wanting to read solely historical fiction in no time.

Audrey approves of books.  All books.

Currently listening to: Lorde.  She is a 16 year old girl from New Zealand who rocks it Lana Del Rey style, except more badass...And she is way cute.  Not as cute as my niece, though.

Time Flies.

Mini Update -

I cannot stress enough how fast this summer has gone by.

Time flies when you are having fun, that's for sure.

Next Sunday, I go home to New York to visit my family.

All 3 of the Madden siblings will be under one roof.... For one week only.  Seriously.

It's my little brother's last week before he's off to college in Buffalo, my sister and niece are living there, and I am making a rare appearance.  Oh, and Taz is mine for the cuddling.

Mayhem will ensue.

Just kidding, it's going to be lovely.  I really am so excited to see my beautiful family.

I hike by myself sometimes.  My family doesn't like the sound of that, but it's peaceful and I really love it.  I'll give those who are thinking about this a warning though:  If you start hiking with a hard hike (the Subway for instance) you're going to want to scramble up every rock you see.  You may or may not get lost.  Just a forewarning.

Because of aforementioned issue, I did purchase some trail running shoes at the Outdoor Retailer Show - Which I was lucky enough to go to because it was absolutely amazing!!  Thanks Daysha, Rocky, Smurf, and Kelli!

Let's end this mini post with some pictures from the outdoor retailer show....

The amount of free goods we got was a little too much to store in Daysha's bag.

Such fun!

And this guy.... 

My Summer - Amazing.

I can't believe that it is already this far into summer.

I have been so hesitant to admit it, but Utah has really grown on me.

I've realized it really is a lovely place to live.

It is absolutely beautiful...No words can describe it.

There are a lot of places here and things to do, that really absolutely nowhere else can compare to.

I got to cross off some things off of my Utah Bucket List.

Zion's National Park - check.  And I have to mention that I did the most amazing, most coveted hike there is to do there- The Subway.  A 9.5 mile intense hike that was worth every single second. 

(Let's just note I am the most out of shape person out there -  Adrenaline is one hell of a natural drug.)

Honestly, I cannot even describe the beauty.  Pictures cannot even justify it.  I was in awe the entire time.

 That's me in blue, and Emily hoisting herself down..For a good laugh, picture me doing what Emily is doing and dropping into a waterfall behind that rock.  Scary but hilarious.

I was also giddy like a little kid the entire hike- I forgot how much I enjoy adventures like scrambling down rocks, jumping around, repelling and just being fearless.  It was such a liberating feeling.

We did barely miss a flash flood, and it poured during the best parts of the hike.  By rain, I mean cold rain.  My lips turned blue.  I was delirious to the point that when repelling down a steep rock, I smiled and waved and could care less that I was walking basically horizontal downwards.  But, not many people could say they hiked through pouring rain in the Subway.  What a brave crew we were.

I received some freaking awesome battle wounds, almost hit my head behind a waterfall, and swam through probably less than 60 degree streams.

And, I had an amazing group of people to do it with.  It was the best group ever.  So diverse and so positive and excited.

I loved every single minute of it.  Maybe I could have done without the switchback at the end of the hike, but it was totally worth it.  Just think Stairmaster times a million and me almost crying...Because I've never been on a Stairmaster.  I crack myself up.

Floating the Weber River - Check.

Sadly, I do not have a personal photo or a friend's photo of it, but picture my friends and I floating on a 'lazy river' on one of those white tubes.  It is so relaxing, but at the same time we have had so many laughs and such a great time.  Imagine floating down a river with not a care in the world and some beautiful surroundings.  Honestly, East Coast wise there is nothing I can compare it to besides a lame water park with a lazy river.  Except this is nature.  Again, I can't even describe.

Hiking in general - Check.

The first hike I went on this summer was a little bit discouraging.  I went with some lovely people who are also in shape.  I'm not.  Especially with uphill nonsense.  But I did it; I didn't give up.  

Last Wednesday I decided to venture on my own, on a hike called City Creek right near the Capitol building.  It's easy until you go uphill.  A few days before, I had gone with someone and we had to turn back due to weather.  I decided to go back myself on the Wednesday I had off.  I didn't believe in myself - I had it in my mind that I would get to the hard part and give up...But I didn't (I think it being overcast was helpful).  But I seriously did it!  I made it to the top, through knee-high brush and with some crappy sneakers.  Oh my, did it feel good.

Did I mention I bought my own hiking backpack?  Seriously, what a triumph.

 Last - Fun in general - Check.

People come into your life for a reason - The people that I have spent this summer with have been absolutely amazing.  There is no other way to describe them.  They have all shown me Utah in a way I have never seen it before, along with showing me that there are actually some great people here.  I have loved every minute of this summer.  Thank you all for that.

On Saturday, we went to a block party.  A block party that had a drum bus!!  The drum bus is basically a school bus with about 20 different bongo drums.  You sit there and pretend you are a pro-drummer and start some beats with everyone around you.  Whoever thought of this idea was a genius.  We all had a blast on a lovely July Saturday night.

P.S. Those amazing Subway pictures were by none other than Carl Heath - Future famous photographer.  Thanks Carl!!!!

Books and Being Lucky.

So, the last time I tried to write a blog it was an epic fail.  It will forever be in my drafts.  I will never post it.

I was really bitter about a book I read.  The only part I'll divulge is that once finished with said book, I threw it across the room and almost lost faith in modern day literature.

Some of those books are on the to-do list.

Thankfully, a friend of mine allowed me to borrow one of her books and it restored my faith in literature.

It is the kind of book you get lost in, you dream about, and you fall in love with every word on every page.

I'm 60 pages away from finishing, and taking a break to write this post because I really don't want it to end.  I want to live in that book.

"The Shadow of the Wind" by Carlos Ruiz Zafon is the name of the book, in case anyone is interested.

Not much to update you on -

Just remember that life is precious, please.

We are all lucky to be here.

So lucky.

Books, Cats and Rain.

Today was not a cold, gloomy day...But I came across this today and was like, "This is totally me".  

It rarely rains here and I love rain.

I love cats (most of the time).  They can be good company.

I love books too.

The other day, my coworker and I have a conversation as follows:

Coworker:  Amy, you're not married so you don't cook much do you?  Here, you should bring this ramen home...Gotta take what you can get.

Me:  Sure as hell I don't.  That's a good idea probably.

Coworker:  I can just see you coming in to work twenty years from now proudly bringing in your family Christmas photo:  Just you and twenty cats. 

I laughed all day long.

I told some of my coworkers who were like "Amy, it's okay, he can just be too honest sometimes."

What they don't comprehend is that unlike the majority of Utahns, I love people that are blunt and silly. 

 It makes me happy inside.

So what you can get from this is:

Don't take life too seriously,

Books and cats are your friends,

And rain is awesome.

Happiness is...

Day 14:  10 Things That Make Me Happy.

In no random order.

1) Weekend brunch with friends, when I can.  I've loved bottomless (not what you're thinking) weekend brunch ever since I lived in New York City.  Although in Salt Lake it's not nearly as comparable, I still think it's a lovely time to catch up with girlfriends.

2) Books.  Getting lost in books.  I just can't even describe it; I went through two in the past 48 hours that I've had off.  Although they were light reads (300 pages each) I just love exercising my imagination.

3) Nick and Jess in New Girl...I am not the biggest fan of TV, but I do love them as a couple (give me a break, the season finale was just on and I may or may not still be teary-eyed from it.  Ugh).

4) My job.  Although it's a job and I dread going sometimes, I leave feeling so happy and thankful that I can be a part of these kiddos' lives.  Walking in on a bald little 9 year old boy dancing to the Spongebob theme song in his PJs just makes me smile so much.  I may or may not have danced along with him.

5) Spotify Premium.  I'll admit it, I pay monthly but it's been so worth it.

6) My bed.  I can't seem to get myself out of it 99% of the time I wake up in it.

7) Homes in Sugarhouse.  Recently I went on a late night stroll through those neighborhoods and I wanted to impulsively buy the majority of them.  I really want to own a home, by the way.

8) Which brings me to this, dogs makes me happy...Especially Taz, especially Vizslas in general.  I can't wait to have a backyard, because that is when I will raise a dog (hopefully a Vizsla).

9)  Being independent.  Knowing I don't need anyone to rely on.  That's an accomplishment of mine.

10)  Learning.  Forever learning.  I need to go back to school ASAP!!

10 words, missing, and saying sorry.

Day 10: Sell yourself in 10 words or less.

I don't want to sell myself.

Love you bye.

Day 11: What I miss.

I'm a very nostalgic person.

With that comes a lot of moments that I miss.

I guess, to make this short I miss home.  I miss my family.  I miss my 7-month old niece who can sit up and say 'mama' now.

I blog about this a lot.

I love my family so much.

Day 12: Issue a public apology.

I am sorry to the friends I haven't worked hard to stay in touch with.

I love you all;  Most of you need to move to Utah though, and then we will be best friends forever.

This was a short but sweet one.

Sorry I guess. (Public apology number two).

Advice, today, and embarrassment.

Day 8:  Piece of Advice.

It 's not the end of the world.

December 21st, 2012 came and went.  The Mayans were way off.
Life will go on, even though you may not think it will right now.

Whatever you're going through right now, there's a 99.9% chance that there will be a better day in your lifetime (unless you truly think this is the best day of your life and you could die happy...Then this doesn't apply to you; look away).

So keep your head up.  

It gets better.

Day 9:  A moment in your day.

Happy Friday y'all.

I'm reading "The Emperor of All Maladies" - It's "the biography of cancer" and one damn long book.

Day 10:  Most Embarrassing Moment.

I seriously have lost count of all of my most embarrassing moments.  

Being a kid who peed her pants when laughing too hard until she was 15,  I'd say my life is full of them.

This is from 2 weeks ago: 

Me Going into a 12 year old hispanic patient's room, and trying to wake him up:  "Miguel, Miguel it's time to take your medications!" -me.  "His name is Michael." - His dad.  Oops.

Right now:  I'm listening to Justin Bieber.

Long ago, recently, today:  Every day is an embarrassing moment.

Day 7: The thing(s) you're most afraid of

I was debating whether or not to make this post serious or silly...

I guess I'll do 50/50.

In all seriousness though,

My biggest fear is that I won't be able to have kids.

Don't ask me why, but this has been a big fear of mine since I was fourteen.

I thought, "What if I do something bad and God punishes me and takes away the thing I want to have most in life?".  I've done my share of bad things, so I guess I still have reason to be scared.

I know that so many people can't have kids and my heart aches for them.  I know that there are options, but it still really scares me.  

In non-seriousness -

The other day I was putting my pants on and felt a bump towards my bottom-area.  I immediately just thought it was the back of an earring or something.  I proceeded to discreetly put my hands down my pants, and lo and behold it was a bug.  A bug that was very much alive and crawling towards my butt.  I screamed so loud, and scared the neighborhood I'm sure.

There you have it .

What Do I Do?

Day 6, Monday: If you couldn't answer with your job, how would you answer the question, 'what do you do'?

Kind of silly, but I got asked this question for the first time in a while last Thursday.  I realized how cliche it is, especially when it's the first question someone asks about you; although a lot of the time your career can say a lot about yourself.

So, how would I have answered said girl if I didn't say "I'm a nurse"? 

I live.

I love

I'm 25 years young and have done a lot with my life.

When I don't work I do these things:

Play piano if there is one around me.

Ski if I'm not working nights.

Try new foods.

Try new things.  Anything.

Hang out with friends.

Read.  Read everything.  I live with my kindle by my side.

I'm really good at doing facebook stalking.

I do a lot of Dlisted browsing.

Soak up sun.

Travel.  Anywhere I can.

Think about my family.

That's what I do.

When I am working:

Without using the 'N' word (tehe)...

I take care of kids with cancer.

I give them medicine, love them, and make them crafts sometimes.

Sometimes I get to play dinosaurs and trucks.

I rub their backs a lot when they aren't feeling good.

Overall, I love where I am with my life.

Tres Quatro Cinco.

Day 3:  Things That Make You Uncomfortable.

Since I was a little kid, the number one thing that makes me uncomfortable:

Someone embarrassing themselves in public.

(maybe because I've been there, done that)

It gives me anxiety.

It makes me want to hug them and take them out of that situation.

Other random things:

Girls with barely any clothes on.

Awkward guys, especially on dates when there are significant pauses in conversation.

Belly buttons.  Just, no.

Long toe nails.

Day 4:  Your favorite quote.

I've already shared my favorite quote of all time a few days back, so I'll do something a little different.  These are my favorite two quotes from 'A Tree Grows in Brooklyn'.

"Oh, magic hour, when a child first knows she can read printed words!"

"From that time on, the world was hers for the reading. She would never be lonely again, never miss the lack of intimate friends. Books became her friends and there was one for every mood."

I remember the first time I learned how to read printed words.  In fact, I remember back to longing to be able to, especially when driving in the car on long car rides and staring at signs.  When I first learned I could read by myself, I was so in love and so intrigued by any and every kind of book - Even children's encyclopedias.

The first book I read on my own:  "Amelia Bedelia".  When I googled the book just now, this came up and I laughed a little too hard.

Day 5:  Public profession of love for another blogger friend.

I'm not a fan of "blogland" or whatever people call it these days.

I just like to write things down.

And crazy, but I think I profess publicly the love of my friends (including my family; I'm lucky to call my family my friends too) here quite often.

So if you really want to know, scroll it.

Special mentions:  My sister Ali, my brother Matt, Nichole, Steph, Roni, Marissa - You're all in this blog somewhere, but where you always are is in my heart.  So cheesy, I know, but so is publicly professing love.