My little sis.

To my sister:
It is your birthday as of 3 1/2 hours ago (even though you weren't born until 12pm). You were the little devil sister that could REALLY push my buttons and I love you so much for that. We used to fight all the time, and tonight during dinner I realized really that you mean so much to me...I'm so glad we finally saw through our differences and decided to get along. You are my polar opposite, but I am so grateful that I have you as a sister. Even though the time we get to spend together is short, I really love it.




Eh, I'm cheesy.
I spent the last few days in Philadelphia. It was SO good to see some friends. Ugh I miss them so much already.
I'm just in a weird mood. Maybe it's because it is 3:40am. But regardless...happy Halloween. I'm a twig for Halloween. Because, that's what everyone called me that while growing up, so I figured I'd fulfill the stereotype...It actually turned out to be a cool costume, fun to find for sure. We spent about an hour in the Wal Mart dressing room and I ended up buying size 10/12 in kids leggings. Love my life.
Ali: Even though maybe I look like I'm Ethiopian, I'll always be there to punch out other girls for you. Because I'm your BIG sister. No matter what.

caught up

"The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone."

The truth is, we're not alone.

I feel like it's so easy to get caught up in things....We forget that. Just wanted to remind myself/people who read this. I found the quote on somebody's facebook page (see, stalking pays off).
And I put up a picture of the Manti temple because it's my favorite temple, and as I was reading the quote I thought of it.

a LOVE-ly post.

So, my relatively new good friend Shay posted a post about love, and it really got me thinking about the word and what it means. Everyone defines love differently. Herein lies the problem.

These are my thoughts.

I am a very loving person. I give away my love all too easily. I think in general I give way more love than I receive, but I usually don't mind. I love to love. I think some people know a very important saying to me is "All You Need Is Love"....Apparently I was stupid enough to think it would be okay to even tattoo that saying on my foot as a constant reminder (I regret this). But it still has such meaning to me. Love is beautiful, and I'm not just talking about romance kind of love. I have love for my family, friends, patients, dogs, Pepper Ann, the world and most of the people that inhabit it, and most importantly Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I love people who don't love me back. I love people who have taken me for granted. But, I still love them.
What hurts the most, in any type of relationship is when someone says they don't know if they love you anymore or if they ever did. Don't say you love someone if you're not 100% sure you mean it. Love is SUCH a strong word. I feel like if you love someone, you will always love them no matter what to some extent. Even if it's in the tiniest place in your heart, your love for that person will always be there. I know that's true for me.


Kind of Love related..
This morning I watched a little 2 year old boy undergo open heart surgery. It was by far one of the most beautiful things I've seen, to witness this little boy's live, beating heart right in front of me (albeit a terrible circumstance). Life is so beautiful. Cherish the life you're given. We all have that heart somewhere inside of us.

NOTting Hill.

Lazy Sunday's are....Boring, but sometimes totally necessary.

I spent 2 hours of my Sunday watching "Notting Hill". I remember liking it when I was younger. I got 2 things out of the movie......1) Julia Roberts is beautiful. She is just stunning. and 2) love is a lot more complicated than a few conflicts in the story line, and then a resolution at the end. Like an oops, I messed up let's try this again, finish. No, it doesn't work like that unfortunately. And whoever says American girls rely on pop culture, especially film to teach them what dating is like and therefore we are all led astray, this is true. But it was a cute movie. And I realized where this famous line came from:

"Don't forget. I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy...asking him to love her."

Only a line Julia Roberts could pull off.

This was another ridiculous, useless post.

On another note, I love Skype and how I can watch TV with my best friend all the way out in Utah...We can scream, laugh and "ooooh" at how hot the guys are in the show, and we can see eachother while doing it. Haha.

pondering

Maybe this is a ridiculous thing to blog about (actually, everything I blog about is ridiculous usually), but today I'm trying to be a little sympathetic/understanding amidst a stupid thing I did today that I refuse to talk about.

So, something that REALLY irks me is when I look at photos on facebook, in albums titled "I felt pretty today" or "good pictures of me", and they consist of not 1 but about 85 images of solely themselves. The song "You're So Vain" is cued in my head at most times.
But I tried to see it from their point of view today. I think a lot of these people do this to boost their confidence and remember that they ARE pretty. When I have my "feeling pretty" days, I feel good about myself. Maybe these girls just want to capture their moment on film and share it with the world because they feel confident at the moment. It's a completely normal, womanly thing to want to feel pretty everyday.

So women, go on and conquer the world. If it's your thing to document this and post it on facebook, then I guess that's your call. I'll still be singing "You're So Vain" in my head, but know that I'm a little bit more understanding.

along came...

Just wanted to share with you one of my favorite SNL skits (besides any by Andy Samberg obviously)....Debbie Downer is classic....This is one of my favorites because Lindsay is in it and she used to be my favorite actress embarrassingly enough. The other reason is self-explanatory. Even the actors couldn't hold in their laughs.








SNL - Debbie Downer Featuring Lindsay Lohan Video - Buzznet - Watch more Videos at Vodpod.

you shouldn't give up.

Someone found this written on a piece of paper , stuck in a book in a bookstore. What a pleasant surprise it would be to find this as a reminder.

You shouldn't give up.
Fight for yourself and
who you are. You've got
to go through the worst
times in life to get the best.

So I just watched "A Little Princess", throwback movie from 1995 and it seriously made my heart melt. It was my absolute favorite movie when I was little. I remember going to buy it at the movie store and it came with this cute little locket like the one the girl wears in the movie. I wore it everywhere. Watching that movie reminded me of how much of an imagination I had when I was little...I think that's why I loved that movie so much. I TOTALLY suggest going to go watch a movie from your long lost childhood that you have forgotten about. It puts a smile on your face :)

patience.

A word I've always despised. There's always something you "can't wait" for. Christmas, for instance. That's something you're impatient for when you're little. Or growing up. Or summer break.

Patience is so important, that's obviously why the word is in the scriptures so many times, but it will always be something I struggle with. Because everyday, you have to be patient for whatever it is you want. Every day it's something to think about.

Anyway...Me rambling at 1am. Not cool.

have you ever...

Have you ever had one of those days where you just want to stay in all day, curl up on the couch and read all the books you used to read when you were little? I would LOVE to remember the titles of all the books I read. They made me so incredibly happy and I loved them so much. I don't know what my parents did with them, but they're gone. They were the cutest stories ever, too. Now, it's just one mashed up memory of a bunch of tidbits of the stories.

one great gift.

Today, I was thinking of people's birthdays. The funny part was, the birthdays I remembered were birthdates of people I barely knew. I saw it once probably on facebook, pondered upon it for a second, and then it was stored in my memory.

I think one of our greatest gifts is the gift of memory. I think if the veil was lifted and we COULD remember our pre-existence, I would probably remember the coolest/most random details. My friends used to be astounded at my memory. I'm really good at numbers. I'm even better at remembering random events that occurred when I was little. It's a source of such great joy for me when I remember little things from my childhood. It also is a source of sorrow, because in pretty fine detail I can remember a lot of struggles in my childhood.

I was talking about memories from my childhood earlier with a friend, and then I thought about it in serious detail while driving and talking to my Grandma. She had a stroke last weekend. She was telling me how she was forgetting things, daydreaming a lot, and is in therapy to help improve her memory at the rehabilitation center. 95% of the time on the phone, she sounded like my grandma. But then she'd forget I was at school and warn me to watch out for crazy people on the subway. That's not like my grandma.

Memory is such a beautiful gift that we are given. They can make us laugh, make us cry, but most of all remind us that we live in a mostly beautiful world.


Most beautiful lyrics ever.....That remind me I still have that little girl inside of me :) how lame. Ha.

"Seven Years"
-Norah Jones

Spinning, laughing, dancing to
Her favorite song
A little girl with nothing wrong
Is all alone

Eyes wide open
Always hoping for the sun
And she'll sing her song to anyone
That comes along

Fragile as a leaf in autumn
Just falling to the ground
Without a sound

sidenote.

p.s. general conference was so wonderful, so necessary. what a great weekend to have it on. it reminds me that heavenly father knows me. He knows what I need, how I feel, what I need to hear. He knows what I'm going through and He wants to help me. He knows of the potential that I have in me and that sometimes, I just need to be reminded.


This is from a previous talk, not in this general conference...but i love it.

"First of all, I want you to be proud you are a woman. I want you to feel the reality of what that means, to know who you truly are. You are literally a spirit daughter of heavenly parents with a divine nature and an eternal destiny. That surpassing truth should be fixed deep in your soul and be fundamental to every decision you make as you grow into mature womanhood. There could never be a greater authentication of your dignity, your worth, your privileges, and your promise. Your Father in Heaven knows your name and knows your circumstance. He hears your prayers. He knows your hopes and dreams, including your fears and frustrations. And He knows what you can become through faith in Him. Because of this divine heritage you, along with all of your spiritual sisters and brothers, have full equality in His sight and are empowered through obedience to become a rightful heir in His eternal kingdom, an "[heir] of God, and joint-[heir] with Christ." Seek to comprehend the significance of these doctrines. Everything Christ taught He taught to women as well as men. Indeed, in the restored light of the gospel of Jesus Christ, a woman, including a young woman, occupies a majesty all her own in the divine design of the Creator. You are, as Elder James E. Talmage once phrased it, "a sanctified investiture which none shall dare profane."
Be a woman of Christ. Cherish your esteemed place in the sight of God. He needs you. This Church needs you. The world needs you. A woman's abiding trust in God and unfailing devotion to things of the Spirit have always been an anchor when the wind and the waves of life were fiercest. I say to you what the Prophet Joseph said more than 150 years ago: "If you live up to your privileges, the angels cannot be restrained from being your associates."

Song on my playlist today: "Daughter of a King "....Not sure who it's by.

whatevs

if i were a boy.....

Ha. The title of this is irrelevant (like a lot of my titles). I've just been listening to a lot of Beyonce lately. Don't hate. Usually not my type of music, but her music is pretty powerful. I'm actually perfectly content with being a girl though, minus the emotions part.

Nothing really new has been happening in my life. I'm just home for the second weekend in a row. My sister is coming home tomorrow and gracing me with her presence. Life is pretty stagnant right now. I need something interesting to do on the weekends. I really have nowhere to go most of the time now. It's really interesting...One lesson I learned this summer is I was ready to leave the nest (that being home); I was away for close to 4 months without ever stepping foot on Horseheads soil, and I was content. I didn't really miss too much about the place. I've now been here for 2 weekends in a row. Frankly, it's driving me crazy. My mom's house is a zoo. I don't really have many friends here. There's nothing to do except for Taco Bell and WalMart runs (and I realized the only thing I miss about WalMart is it's unbeatable prices, I would trade New York over WalMart any day).

In other news, I will most likely be in New York City next semester on the weekends. I was invited to do a preceptorship in maternal/newborn nursing at Lenox Hill (where I had my externship). I'm so excited that I have this opportunity. Let's cross our fingers that this all works out. I simply asked about if they offered preceptorship opportunities, and I got this e-mail.
"I discussed your request with the Nurse Managers in Maternal-Child Health and they said they would love to have you. Please complete everything in the attachments, so you can begin. Welcome back"

I am SO blessed to be offered that position so quickly. They welcomed me back with open arms, and I'm very grateful for it!

"Skeleton Song"
-Kate Nash