slacker.

I'm sorry I haven't written here in a while. I've been busy, I haven't had the best of weeks, but I'm alive and here in a great City and that's all that matters.
Work last week ended yesterday on kind of a bad note with my preceptor. I'm not trying to sound racist in any way, but she's from a foreign country and the ways she says some things to me are very offensive. Basically, I feel like I'm doing very well and she tells me I am not doing a good job because I'm yawning while I'm in the hallways. At 8am, yeah I'll be yawning. Never in front of a patient, though. That doesn't mean I'm not taking things seriously. At the hospital, the case managers do "discharge phone calls" and three patients have mentioned my name saying they received exceptional care from me. I'm very proud of that and her words kind of discouraged me.
Anyway, other things are kind of going confusing. I was homesick for the first time in a while...As I was on the verge of tears, I ran into 5 of my friends from home. What are the odds in this big city? The Lord reminds us we are not alone in funny ways. My sister is coming on Friday though! With Kevin..I can't wait.
I saw Transformers iMax style. It was a little lame. But I do love Meghan Fox and sort of have a girl crush on her.
I got a Nikon digital camera...It's beautiful. Ruby red : )
I went to my first Mormon Dance Party tonight. It was funny walking into this crowded, hot sweaty apartment and no alcohol was there. Meaning, I liked it a million times more than any Penn State Party. We had lots of fun. I wish I could stay here forever with these friends I've made.

all grown up.

Here I am, it's Monday. I have to go to work tomorrow, and I realized that on Wednesday or Thursday I will be getting my first official paycheck. It will be glorious. So today I decide to celebrate a little bit early and splurge. I didn't buy too much, but I did realize that in New York, it's so easy to be short on money. New York = The most materialistic capital of the nation. Whether it's food or clothing, pick your vice and you have it within at least a half of a block from where you live. I have yet to go grocery shopping. I live in Hell's Kitchen (which should be called Heaven's Kitchen, it's an infinite abyss of restaurants), and 9th avenue is my playground in which I find ALL sorts of decadent food to try. I love the city.
Yesterday was Sunday, father's day. My good friend Neal gave a wonderful talk on walking in the ways of our Father (in Heaven). He talked about how our fathers on earth may come from different backgrounds, may have made many mistakes, but it is our obligation to love them unconditionally because that's a covenant we made with our Heavenly Father. Even though my dad chose a different path, I still have to follow my Father in Heaven to receive eternal life, but that doesn't mean I can't respect my dad's choices. It was calming and reassuring to hear this message, but at the same time I was conflicted. My dad has hurt me so many times. But in the end, I still have to Love him. And I'll try my best to. Thanks Neal for your words that meant so much to me.

So, I've visited Serendipity's (it's famous for its' icecream and it was in the movie Serendipity)...It was delish.

That's me and Cameron before eating our humungous Sundae. Yummy.


Me and my friend Lauren at the Bodies Exhibition....I LOVED IT!!!

life .

I woke up at 8 this morning feeling ready to go. But where? I just love relaxing.
Yesterday, the Bodies Exhibition was one of the coolest things I've ever seen. I loved every minute of it. Apparently the cadavers are Asian prisoners, and it's this huge controversy. Well, it's their way to pay back their debt to society. That's what I think at least.
My favorite part was the room where they have all different embryos at different stages of development. To some people that might sound so creepy, but to me it was absolutely beautiful. They displayed them with the utmost respect. The gift of life is so wonderful. These babies displayed may not have had the chance to live, but I was so filled with love and respect learning from them.
Later, we went to Paesano's, this amazing italian place in Little Italy. Little Italy, how I love thee.
Tonight I'm going to a movie with my friend Neal. We're going to see UP, it apparently got amazing reviews. It was either that or going to see Shakespeare in Central Park with Lauren (Anne Hathaway stars in it) but to be honest, I just don't feel like waiting in line for tickets this afternoon. Maybe some other time. See, I told you I'm lame.

I'm Alive!

I miss writing about my life here!
But, life has been so exhausting. I worked three 12-hour shifts this past week Monday-Wednesday. Remind me to never do that again. Three days in a row is absolutely brutal. But, I love it. I wouldn't ideally choose orthopedics as a floor to work on, but I think the main reason I do nursing is because I love my patients so much. I genuinely care about each one of them.
Yesterday, an old man tracked me down so he could say goodbye when he was discharged and planted a big kiss on my cheek while he was in his wheelchair to thank me for everything. That's what I love. I love it when patients can see that I'm doing this for them and not for my own self-satisfaction or for money.
Anyway, I've been kind of sick the past few days and it's cold here in the City which is a bummer. I've walked the Brooklyn Bridge more than I can count in the past couple of weeks but honestly, wouldn't that be the coolest place ever to be proposed to?! Ah. I have met so many cool people here.
Today, me and my friend Lauren are going to the Bodies Exhibition at the Seaport...Actual human body cadavers on display for learning/museum purposes. AKA my dream come true. It's SO rainy here today. On my day off, how ironic.
I really don't think I'll ever want to leave here. I am (as Cam would say) "living THE life". So many cool things, so little time.

Love After Love

This poem I found in one of the front pages of the book, "The Time Traveler's Wife". I've heard this is a good book, so I'm giving it a try. Already, I love it because this poem starts it off. I think it's beautiful.

Love After Love

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

-Derek Walcott

Oh, and another awesome song.
Lillie - Lisa Hannigan. I think I like it better than the other one I posted earlier.


I have one slight problem in my life right now. It's a total blessing right now, though. I am surrounded by members of the church whom I've all fallen in love with. They are some of the most amazing people I've met. I only hang out with LDS people, and this has never happened to me before. But what happens when I leave, and I'm not surrounding myself with all members anymore? I don't want to think about it.

Back and Forth.

Back and forth= My Subway life. I love the Metro and how convenient it can be. However, it can sometimes be a pain waiting for it to come when you're on a schedule.
Anyway, work is amazing so far. My feet and legs have never ached so bad, but I love all of my patients (and they love me, I hope). Orthopedics is a floor I'd never consider myself in, but I'm happy so far. I like going consecutive days because I get to know the patients and they are great. One woman was trying to hook me up with her 35-year old son who works at a restaurant near where I live. I told her I had a boyfriend.

Anyway.I'm exhausted this week. I haven't been posting a lot because of that, and because this New York life is just too much fun. However, the Manhattan Public Library is still my favorite place in New York. Love you reading.

feel our way.

I think it's safe to say that I love my job so far. My preceptor is amazing.

Current song in my head: 'I Don't Know' - Lisa Hannigan
If you walk away, I will keep my head
We will feel our way through the dark
Though I don't know you
I think that I would do
I don't believe at all

Everything will be fine.

Rain.

I have just come to the realization that rain in the City sucks. I didn't want to use that word because I think it sounds unintelligent but that's the only word that describes it. I have no car, therefore I must walk everywhere. I could take the subway, but it's a 5 minute walk to the subway station and then however long it takes to go where I want to go from there. I hate wet jeans, and having to use an umbrella. So, I guess this is the first time since I've been here that I can say I miss my car and how easy it is to get places when it rains with that luxury.
That's all for now. I'm going to go find a Dunkin Donuts because it's National Donut Day and free donuts are calling my name.
Is it bad that I have a newfound love for Lady GaGa? It's kind of embarrassing to admit.

hey girl.

So I haven't written since Sunday night. That officially makes me a slacker. But I've never been busier/happier.
Right now I'm hiding from the elevator workers outside of my door. They both hit on me separately. I want to puke.
Basically, life has been good. Monday night I went to an amazing Thai restaurant with Lauren just down the street from me cleverly titled "Yum Yum". However, it is not as clever as the Chinese place uptown deemed "China Fun". Where do they come up with these names?
Tuesday, I spent about 4 1/2 hours waiting for a physical exam at Lenox Hill. That was nonsense. Hopefully I'll be cleared. I found out I am not colorblind, and they taught me how to put on a mask as if I didn't know already. That sounds ridiculous for me to complain, but whatever. 4 hours for a physical? This better not be a foreshadowing of me being miserable at my externship. I also found out I am going to be placed on a medical-surgical floor. I hate med-surg. I wanted critical care. Bummer.
So last night me and Lauren watched a movie and found this AMAZING place down the street from me that sells 99cent slices of pizza. And it was delicious. I am happy at my cheap finds. However, I just dropped off 19 pounds of laundry at a wash&fold...costed me $18.00. Apparently wash and folds are the only way to do laundry around here, and it's right across the street so it's way more convenient than searching for a laundromat. The man was so nice.