Halloween and Sister.

Happy Halloween y'all!

I have probably shared above picture about a million times on this blog (for a million different reasons) but it's halloween, it's classic, and it's my sister's birthday.  She's 23.  

That means she's getting old...And so am I.

In honor of this holiday, I am home in my pajamas.  I found out via email that Ann Taylor Loft is having a 40% off everything flash sale and since it's within walking distance of my condo (seriously, what a curse/blessing/flashback to New York City living), I had to go get myself some treats.  After that was done, I realized I didn't have any Halloween candy..And we have some super cute kids that live above us so I felt obliged to be prepared.

I stumbled across my favorite fall candy EVER, caramel apple lollipops.

  I bought two jumbo packages.

No one has shown up and it's been 2 hours.

That means that they're all mine.  Yum yum yum.

I was thinking about maybe bringing some upstairs to my neighbors, but that's considered kind of creepy these days I think.

Speaking of creepy....

This is me circa 1999.  One of my old good friends put this up on facebook and I almost died laughing.  At that time, I thought I was a beautiful, stylish Britney Spears from her video "Hit Me Baby One More Time" -  Not even close Amy, not even close.  So awkward, but so classic.

I showed this to Leard last night and he did a triple take and said something to the extent of...

"That was you?!  You've changed a lot."

Yep.

 Next on the agenda,

My sister.  Alison, Ali Cat, Ali Kitten, ButterAliCat, Alan....
She is 23 as of 12:00pm today.  On Halloween.

I was 2 1/2 years old when she made her appearance into the world.

There is video footage somewhere of me, the only child, being asked if I wanted a brother or a sister.  To which I responded "No, can I have a dog?"

But instead, I lucked out with a sister.

 It's been approximately 4 years since our last physical fight (I ended up with a big scratch on my face, she ended up with milk on her Macbook and hair pulled out).  

Now, we love each other.  We always have, but still.

Now, she's a mom and I'm an Aunt.  Weird.

I love us Madden girls.  

Ali, you are beautiful.

Love you so much.

I'm proud of you.  And I am lucky you are my little sister FOREVA.

First thing's First, Second Thing's Second, Etc.

I'm going to talk about a few things tonight-

One being that I miss my family.

That is a given.

I miss them every day and I wish, hope and pray that they will come to see me soon.
I've been in Utah for over 2 years with not one visit!

Second is my new cooking hobby-

I love it!

I have  been cooking a lot of different dishes that would have otherwise been out of my comfort zone... And they are turning out delightful.

If only everyone in the world had a Tuesday night off, then I could cook for all of my loved ones.

That's another thing about cooking - It kind of makes me lonely sometimes.  Because when I am super happy and proud of a dish I made, it's hard to find someone to enjoy it with me.

(plus, I need a dining room table, or any kind of table and chairs to host a meal.)

Third is my job. 

My job can be hard sometimes,

and compassion fatigue is real.

Although it's hard to explain to people with regular jobs who feel fatigue every day,

as a pediatric oncology nurse it's a little different.

I remember telling someone in September that I needed a mental health day.

They laughed.

But really, it's necessary sometimes!

This job can be so rewarding, so amazing, but so draining at the same time.

Especially the hours.  Those kill me...And my social life.

But right now, overall I am happy.

And this is the song that is always in my head.

Sunday Blues.

Sometimes on Sundays,

I wake up after a night shift at 2pm on the wrong side of the bed 

(sometimes literally),

and I'm really grouchy, and feel overwhelmed.

I miss my family, too.

Sometimes, Sundays aren't the best.

I want to go skiing.

She Cooks, Cleans & Listens to Podcasts.

For my twenty-fifth year on this earth,

I think I've finally come into touch with my feminine instincts.

Like cooking and cleaning, for instance.

Weird, but I never really had this domesticated urge until this past year.

I guess last year it started rearing its' head (albeit slowly) with me trying to copy my mom's recipes.

Now I'm making my own, and loving them.

It has to be said here that my mom is a lovely cook -

She has since semi-retired, but still has her token recipes

(among them, Dutch meatballs, the token of all tokens).

This woman that I call 'mom' fed me all of my baby food seasoned with garlic salt.

And she added garlic/garlic salt to anything that you could imagine.

I loved it.

I love garlic....And I will always make that a staple in my cooking.

Did I mention that I find it more peaceful if I'm listening to a podcast?

I pretend like I am a 1940's housewife listening to the AM radio....

Except I'm learning about way cool things.

A couple of my favorites are "This American Life" with Ira Glass, "RadioLab" and "Stuff to Blow Your Mind".

Do you listen to Podcasts, or am I the only one?

First Birthday.

One year ago today, I was waiting to become an aunt.

Little did we know, she would not grace us with our presence until 24 hours later...

Because obviously she wanted to be born on a cool date.  10/11/12.

Since it's all the rage these days for celebrities to post open letters to one another  (See: Miley and Sinead)...And I like to think I'm a celebrity trapped in an ordinary person's body,

I figured I'd post an open letter to my little sister and niece.

To my sister:

Ali, tomorrow is as big of a day for you as it is for Audrey.

It marks one year of you being a mom.

I still can't believe you're a mom sometimes.  And a really good one at that.  Actually I can believe it, but it's still weird!

I know this year has probably been the most challenging year of your life to date.  But I know that you have your priorities right on, and would do anything for Audrey.

I love you, and I am so proud of how much you have grown this past year!

And to my sassy, smiley little niece:

Audrey Jane, 

You can't read right now...But one day you will love to, just like your aunt.  

I have a good feeling about that.  So when that day comes, you'll have this to read.

I know it sucks that I live across the country, but I have such a huge amount of love for you.

So much love that it explodes out of my heart and radiates all the way from my home in Utah 

to yours in New York.  It's constantly streaming out of this heart of mine.

I've only gotten to see you for three short periods of time in the past year:  

Your birth, your first Christmas, and a week in the summer.

Call it silly, but I think you know how much I love you.  You're a smart girl.

When you, your grandpa and Chris picked me up from the airport this summer and I hadn't seen you since Christmas, your sleepy eyes lit up just a little and you smiled when you saw me.

So remember, you and I have a connection little girlfriend....And it isn't just our great taste in dance music ('Blurred Lines' will always be my fave song to dance to with you, and Miley will never come between that).

I can't wait to see you again.

Love,

Aunt Amy